In a world that tends to lionize romantic partnerships as life's ultimate destination, what if we've been quietly undervaluing one of our most sustaining relationships? This week, we talked with Adam Staveski and Jordan Hunter —two humans who have cracked the code on being genuinely excellent friends. Adam brings his delightfully systematic approach to friendship (yes, there's a spreadsheet involved, and no, it's not as clinical as it sounds), while Jordan shares wisdom on how to authentically connect with people. Both offer tips for building friendships during life stages that don’t allow it to happen naturally.
One of the anchors of our conversation was Adam’s garden metaphor: some friends are tall trees (the ones who will weather all the storms of life with you), others are sturdy bushes (reliable but not requiring daily watering), some are delightful flowers (seasonal but highly appreciated), and others are just grass (pleasant part of the social backdrop). It sounds harsh until you realize it's actually liberating—not every relationship needs to be everything, and that's perfectly fine. Noticing these distinctions can help us move more intentionally through our relationships.
We also dive into friendship breakups, the art of not taking things personally, how to cope with the inherent seasonality of friendships, including the hurt when someone gets a new romantic partner and disappears, and what it means to choose a relationship "for relationship's sake."
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